Archive | September, 2011

Terra Nova – Genesis

27 Sep

Anyone that wants to play is more than welcome to – click here for rules and character creation.

Okay, some logistics to work out.

If you can’t watch Terra Nova live and don’t have a DVR, then you have to catch it on-line.  The only problem is that Fox is rocking the impossible-to-catch-up model on Hulu.  Unless you subscribe to DISH or Hulu Plus, there’s an 8-day delay.  And who the fuck subscribes to those services?

The day following each new episode of Terra Nova, I’ll post the Awards List.  I’ll list the event that made me think points should be awarded, the skill it pertains to and the total number of points scored.  Since this is so subjective, I want everyone playing to have a chance to make changes or suggestions to the Award List.  However, this lag between those that watch the show live (or DVR it) and those that have to catch up a 8 days later means that each Award List will in draft form for 14 days.  After 14 days, I’ll stop taking suggestions into account and the Award List will be finalized.

If you haven’t seen the episode yet (or haven’t made your character yet) don’t check out the Award List.  Let’s avoid spoilers and cheating.

Of the character sheets I’ve received, and given that the Award List is temporary, here are the current standings:

The Award List looks like this:

Event Skill Value
defending the third child unarmed combat 2
making a break for the gate unarmed combat 1
what was that? dino id 1
give me a gun and a badge bargaining 2
wounds sutured first aid 1
leech removal first aid 1
just a howler dino id 1
you wanna see something really cool? swimming 2
future x-ray! adv. Med skills 1
um, actually, bracheasaur… dino id 2
I hate the prototarus dino id 1
you can’t have ammo, no way bargaining 2
That is moonshine chemistry 1
gathering fruit/nuts gathering 1
that’s the barb from a slasher tail, obviously dino id 1
this power cell is dead vehicle repair 1
yeah, just a howler dino id 1
hey, your mom’s a doctor, right? first aid 2
shooting slashers marksmanship 2
saving Tasha adv. Med skills 3
there’s a stream about half a click north of here navigation 1
Josh!  Get Down! marksmanship 2

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Playing Along with Terra Nova

26 Sep

I am going to watch Terra Nova.  It starts Monday the 26th on Fox.  It looks like they’ve put an insane amount of money into this thing and as I’ve stated numerous times (in this space and others): the show has dinosaurs.  So, it’s a pretty safe bet that I’m going to enjoy it on some level.

Like the fantasy-footballers and fantasy-baseballers before me, I deem that “not enough.”  I propose that we all make up characters and send them along on the 10th Pilgrimage to Terra Nova.  Everyone will have their own set of skills, and every time that skill is demonstrated on screen you get points.  Whenever the characters split up into groups or factions, or just go on a special mission, you have to decide who your character will accompany.  While in a specific faction or on a mission, you’ll only get points for the skills demonstrated by characters in that group and you’ll miss out on the possible points from the actions of the other characters.

We will keep it simple, as to keep it fun.  No one wants to play D&D here, but let’s make sure that we all have a dog in this fight.

Character creation:

First thing you need to do is download a character sheet (or the pdf character sheet).  Next you select an Occupation.  Occupations determine what skills you automatically have and what additional skills you can learn.  There are six occupations:

Occupations
  Default Skills Survival Skills Science Skills Notes
Soldier Unarmed Combat, Marksmanship

3

0
Hunter Traps and Snares, Marksmanship, Tracking

2

0
Researcher Dinosaur Identification, Navigation

2

1
Technician Electronics Improvisation, Weapon Repair, Vehicle Repair

1

1
Doctor Dinosaur Identification, First Aid, Advanced Medical Skills

1

1
Child none

3

2

 No advanced skills, no social skill

All Occupations get to select one social skill – except children.  Children get the most options, but have no social skills – just like real life.

Next select your skills from the Skill Section on your Character Sheet.  Mark those that you get as your default and then mark whatever additional skills you’ve selected.  You will note that some skills appear in both the Survival and Science section – that’s not a mistake: just make sure not to pick any skill twice.  When selecting advanced skills (listed in bold) you must meet the skill’s prerequisites.  “Hunting” requires both “Tracking” and “Marksmanship.”  “Advanced Medical Skills” requires “First Aid.”

Unless you picked “child,” you must also select one Social Skill.  Sorry, Children, you get nothing.

Finally, pick out a name and find a hilarious character image on line.  Easiest way to populate the image with your own is to right click on the empty character image and select “change picture” and upload your own picture.

Here’s an example I just made: Shortround character sheet

Playing the Game:

While you’re watching the show, pay attention to the various survival, science and social skills the characters use.  When they do, you get points.  The number of points you get is determined by how important that skill usage is.

1 point – You get one point if the skill is being used in the background or just sort of incidentally.  Let’s use “swimming” as an example: if someone is doing laps in the background or just playing in the water, you get one point.

2 points – The 2 point award will probably be the most common.  Any time a skill is part of what the characters are actually doing in a scene, you get 2 points.  Swimming example: someone swims to get somewhere or swims for survival purposes.

3 points – This is reserved for big stuff – something crucial to the plot or resolution of some conflict.  Swimming example: rescuing someone from drowning or venturing into a flooded facility.

The advanced skills (Hunting and Advanced Medical Skills) award 1, 3 and 5 points (instead of 1, 2 and 3) depending on how important the skill is on the show.

Presumably, our characters will break up into separate groups from time to time.  When this happens, be sure to write in on the “Missions and Affiliations” which group you want your character to go with.  While your character is in that group or on that mission, they only get points for the actions of the characters in that group.

Recaps:

Every week, I’ll go through the episodes and address any controversies in the importance of a demonstrated skill.  Also, successful missions may also be award 1, 2 or 3 points.  Or there may be occupational bonus (maybe Researchers collectively discover something) and you’ll get extra points.

Email your character sheets to patrickehlers@gmail.com – I’m really looking forward to seeing hilarious character sheets.

Questions, concerns or suggestions in the comments or by email.

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Breaking Bad – 411 – Crawl Space

25 Sep

Now that was a Breaking Bad.

We’ve been establishing new stakes for most of the season and now they’re all starting to pay off.  Skyler’s been on this road for so long now that it’s almost hard to believe that this is the first time she’s gone from just dealing with the dirty money to out-right criminal behavior.  Sending muscled goons to Beneke’s house to make him see reason would have been bad enough, but then… well, what happened there?  Ted flips out and makes a dash for the door.  But he trips and launches himself headfirst into the furniture.  Is he dead?  At this point, I sorta hope so.  If he lives and reports what happened to the authorities, the whole White operation becomes vulnerable.

And the Whites can’t use the “disappear” option, because Skyler gave over half a million dollars to Ted so he could pay off his IRS debt and she could avoid the extra scrutiny.  Looking back on the season (and the series as a whole, come to think of it), it is incredible how meticulously these pieces have fallen into place.  One of the strongest traits of Breaking Bad has always been the writers’ insistence on keeping the actions of the characters reasonable and reactionary.  People make mistakes, but no one acts for the sole purpose of plot complication – and that’s rare as shit for a television series.  All of these choices have been based in real, honest character work.  And this is where Walt’s honest character has led us.

I can’t shake the image of Walt lying on his back in the crawl space, laughing maniacally, as he realizes that he has no further options.  None of his desperate, hail-mary plans have helped in the slightest.  First he tries to keep Hank from discovering the meth lab at the laundry facility, risking his own life and safety.  But it doesn’t matter: Jesse, Fring, everyone knew what he did, and Jesse for one, was not in a forgiving kind of mood.  Then Walt thinks he can tip-off Hank and disappear before his family is put in danger, but (as always seems to be the case) Walt is just not good enough to make the moving pieces work in his favor.  What kind of options does he have right now?  Seek police protection?  Or have his crimes become too much now, even for a grateful DEA?  The teasers for next week suggest suicide.  But I doubt that would be as effective as Walt seems to believe.  Skyler – and her understanding of the money – is too big a loose end to leave unresolved, and the rest of White family remains in danger, both from Fring’s organization and the law.

It’s great to spend some real time working out just how fucked the Whites are, but our supporting characters are going through some shit too.  Hank finds himself bed-ridden (again) and realizes that he’s got to stop dragging everyone else down with him in his hunt for Fring.  That’s right, Hank’s learning the lesson Ahab never could.  It’s a positive change for the character, and while we don’t get to see how he is responding to a fresh threat on his life, I can only assume it adds to his sense of purpose.  You don’t get death threats for not getting close to the bad guys.

A more remarkable change for the better?  Jesse Pinkman.  He’s hanging out with that girlfriend of his and her son.  Even the video games that he’s playing project a more peaceful existence.  Weeks ago, he was playing Rage (which, doesn’t release until October 4th… so BB takes place in the not-at-all-distant-future?) but now, he’s playing some cheerful two-player Sonic the Hedgehog game.  Jesse has found value in his life again because Fring’s organization sees the value in him.  There’s a harsh scene wherein Jesse straight-up rejects Mr. White.  It feels hard.  It feels wrong.  But Jesse is making the only right move.  Walt has hung him out to dry so many times and demanded so much of Jesse while almost never paying him back.  Then we learn that the only reason Walt isn’t immediately killed by Fring and associates is because Jesse asked that they keep him alive.  Even when Jesse is standing up and proudly declaring “fuck you, Mr. White,” he still respects the man and values his safety.  That’s the heart I feared was missing at the beginning of the season.

We are heading into the home stretch, with only two more episodes this season.  I’m glad that some new TV is starting up – including Boardwalk Empire and Pan Am, both of which I’ll get to catch tonight – but I know nothing will approach the level of intelligence and intensity of Breaking Bad.

I’m going to take up writing about Terra Nova, which premieres tomorrow night on FOX and has dinosaurs.  Dinosaurs.  Do you need an additional reason to watch?  I think I might.  I’ll be posting a little game we can play while slogging through a new mythology-heavy sci-fi series.  So if you just wandered onto my BB write-ups, be sure to check back Monday morning to learn more.

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Green Lantern? Who Cares?

20 Sep

Just a few days before the new Green Lantern movie came out this summer, The Onion posted a story that summarized the problem with releasing the film.  ‘Green Lantern’ to Fulfill America’s Wish to See Lantern-Based Characters Big Screen perfectly captures the public consensus about Green Lantern: “who the hell is Green Lantern?”

Green Lantern is a second tier DC super hero.  Their first tier characters are bulletproof (one literally, both metaphorically) – Superman and Batman.  As such, the time is always right for new Batman or Superman media.  These characters have been in comics, on TV and in the movies pretty much constantly for over 50 years.  Bats and Supes cast long shadows, and even characters that are considered mainstays of the DC Universe, like Flash, Wonder Woman and Green Lantern, are often obscured by this shadow.

So what happened?  Why was summer of 2011 designated as the right time to bring Green Lantern to the big screen?

The answer lies in the insane momentum the character had built up in the comics.  Summer of 2010 issued in another blockbuster with Green Lantern at the center, but this one didn’t play in the cinema.  It was a Universe-wide crossover event called Blackest Night and you could only experience it if you wanted to read comic books.  But that wasn’t the only cost of admission; like most comic ‘events,’ this one relied heavily on the history of these characters.  Blackest Night’s hook was that the dead reanimated and began to terrorize those that were close to them in life.  Some of these deaths stretch back over twenty years.  The result was that Blackest Night frequently plays like a love-letter to fans already familiar with the history of the publisher.

I can’t rightly articulate why, but I badly wanted to read Blackest Night.  Prior to this, I had only read a handful of graphic novels in my life – mostly Frank Miller’s Batman (Year One and Dark Knight Returns), Sin City, Watchmen, etc.  In short, I was reading stories that had caught my eye in the form of films.  Those are all easy buy-ins, as there’s not much in the way of background information.  To understand Blackest Night, I thought, I would have to understand Green Lantern.

Green Lantern – it turns out – has had quite the history.  In the Golden Age (1940s), he was a crime-fighting magician named Alan Scott.  For the Silver Age (1950s) he was reimagined as member of an intergalactic peace-keeping force.  The revamp came about for very practical reasons: science fiction was more popular that magic.  This introduced readers to Hal Jordan, who is now considered the platonic “Green Lantern.”  But there were a few choppy years where Hal was possessed by a malevolent force known as Parallax.  He essentially wiped out the entire Green Lantern Corps and eventually flew himself into the sun to stop his own rampage.  During the rampage and the subsequent years, there were a handful of Earth Green Lanterns: hyper-masculine Guy Gardner, former marine and architect John Stewart, and sensitive artist Kyle Rayner.  In the comics, Kyle was the torch bearer – the last hope for the Corps.  But anyone who grew up watching the Justice League cartoon will remember John Stewart as their Green Lantern.

There’s a whole lot of information to sort through there, and I wasn’t about to go pawing through decades of books to find my bearings.  I jumped in where the internet told me to – the 2004 mini-series, Green Lantern: Rebirth.  Rebirth resurrects Hal Jordan as the Green Lantern and places DC creative guru Geoff Johns in the writer’s chair.  This is where the modern Green Lantern comes from – this series started to push Hal, Guy, Kyle and John into the limelight.

Following the Rebirth mini-series, a new Green Lantern series launched along with a Green Lantern Corps series.  The former following the adventures of Hal Jordan, the latter following the re-establishment of the Corps, with regular focus on Guy Gardner, but featuring an ever-ballooning cast of new Lanterns.  The preamble to Blackest Night begins here, in 2004.  Naturally, I caught all of this in bound collections.  Just getting to Blackest Night involves 6 Green Lantern books and 6 Green Lantern Corps books along with 3 more that tell the story of the Sinestro Corps War.  Add to that, you should probably also read Flash: Rebirth and Identity Crisis to understand what’s happening emotionally in Blackest Night.

That is a prohibitively long reading list.  Without additional research, it turns out that collection isn’t really sufficient to understand everything.  The Blackest Night mythos largely revolves around the splintering of the emotional spectrum.  This essentially amounts to the creation of different colored lanterns, each with their own rules and organizations and all that.  This specific aspect of the world-building drew me in pretty hard.  Hard enough that I was willing to either embrace or ignore that which didn’t totally make sense.  Like what, you ask?  The Sinestro Corps.

Sinestro is a former Green Lantern that harnesses the power of fear through the color yellow and creates his own army of Yellow Lanterns.  Good so far.  But to make this new Lantern Army a formidable threat to the established Green Lanterns (all 3600 of them), some big-time super-villains were tapped.  These villains all unfortunately held storied positions in DC lore.  Let’s explore a little bit of what makes these guys so inaccessible:

Mongul: This is one of the more straight-forward borrowed villains in the SC.  He’s an old Justice League villain, notably messing with Superman.  Really, my quibbles with using Mongul are minor – he’s a monster that like to kill stuff: everything adds up just fine.

Cyborg Superman (a.k.a. Hank Henshaw): Remember when Superman died and then four people stepped forward to replace him and then he just sort of came back?  Vaguely?  Cyborg Superman (not to be confused with Cyborg) was one of those that stepped up to replace him.  But wait, isn’t he a villain in this?  He sorta was then too.  Hank Henshaw has an origin that shares everything but tone with the origin of the Fantastic Four.  Hank, his wife and crew were up in a LuxCorp space shuttle when the whole thing was wracked by some kind of space radiation – just like the F4.  Unlike those heroes, Henshaw and crew had their lives ruined by the radiation.  Hank, in particular, starts to decay as parts of his body fade into an alternate dimension.  Eventually, he gains the ability to possess machines and uses this new skill to build himself a robotic body as his mortal form disintegrates completely.  Proud of his new metal body, he shows it off to his wife who is appropriately horrified.  The late Mrs. Henshaw throws herself out a window, leaving Hank alone in the world.  He eventually finds out that Superman was responsible for the solar flare radiation that caused the original accident, and Hank vows to fuck with Superman as much as possible.  This usually takes the form of looking like Superman, but doing terrible things.  He also destroys Hal Jordan’s hometown, just, you know, because he sucks.  The Cyborg body has been destroyed by the heroes time and time again, but Henshaw’s mind is immortal now and can always construct a new one.  All of this information comes into play at all times when the character is on the page.

The Anti-Monitor: This dude’s gigantic.  Like Godzilla-big.  He’s also made of anti-matter and hails from the anti-matter universe.  He also has a history of DESTROYING UNIVERSES.  The Anti-Monitor first popped up during the original Crisis on Infinite Earths (1987) which tried to reconcile decades of conflicting super hero origin stories.  His role was basically a giant reset button, literally destroying conflicting information.  Less a character and more an editorial tool, Anti-Monitor is a strange choice for a villain in a character-driven story, but there he his.

Prime: Sometimes known as Superman Prime and sometimes known as Superboy Prime, you will never find a more bizarre character concept than Prime.  Prime was born “Clark Kent” despite the fact that his father new full-well that was the name of Superman, a fictional character.  Huh?  Superman Prime comes from the real world, and he reads DC comics populated with Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, etc.  He ends up getting sucked into the worlds of his comic books when the Anti-Monitor somehow DESTROYS THE REAL WORLD.  Yes, comic book readers in 1987 were asked to believe that the world they currently lived in had been destroyed.  Using his powers identical to Superman, Prime helps the heroes defeat the Anti-Monitor.  His reward?  He gets to live in a paradise dimension with Superman 2 and Lois 2 (both from another destroyed universe) and Alex Luthor 3 (from yet another destroyed world).  The only thing Prime needs is continued access to view the stories of the characters he loved reading about in comics back in the real-world.  He doesn’t much care for what he sees (Wonderwoman killing Maxwell Lord, Bane breaking Batman’s back) so he punches a hole in universe that alters reality.  I wish I was making any of this up.  Prime spends the rest of his life alternately complaining about being misunderstood and accidentally killing people.  That is, until he goes all-out-evil and makes it his business to punish all the heroes that disappointed him so much.

Now.  What the hell were we talking about?  Ah yes, why they made a Green Lantern movie.

While reading the comics, I found this sort of insanity fascinating and charming.  What built the Green Lantern up so successfully in the recent run of comics was a reliance of the history of the medium.  But that is necessarily going to be lacking from any film adaptation – which makes the Green Lantern comics of 2010 fundamentally nothing like the Green Lantern movie of 2011.  This is so far from the “the book was better” defense.  What Green Lantern has become is so tied up in the endlessly ridiculous DC Universe that I doubt there could ever be a film that approaches the material in a compelling way.

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Breaking Bad – 410 – Salud

19 Sep

I watched the 63rd Annual Emmy Awards last night.  The whole show.  I even caught some of the red carpet nonsense before.  As is typical for award shows, it was awkward and self-indulgent and long and sorta boring and deserving artists were snubbed left and right (unless they worked on Modern Family – holy shit).

For the first time since the show started, Breaking Bad wasn’t in the running for anything.  This isn’t because she show took a severe dip in quality or anything, there simply weren’t any new episodes during the last TV season.  This means that benevolent acting god Bryan Cranston wasn’t there to cock-block the award for best Lead Actor in a Drama as he had for the last three years.  So this was Jon Hamm’s first real shot at the Emmy for playing Don Draper.  I’m sure I’ll get shit for this, but I’ve never seen Friday Night Lights.  From what I’ve heard, it’s a wonderful little show that deserves to have some attention.  So, good on Kyle Chandler, I guess.

I imagine the rest of the actors going home after the show, a little disappointed, but hell, they’re still successful actors making quality television shows.  Steve Buscemi, Jon Hamm, Michael C. Hall and Timothy Olyphant all have shows that will come back this year and give them another chance to win this award next year, with safety net of playing these same well-regarded characters.  I imagine they settled down in front of the TV and reassured themselves that they’ll make a go for it next year.  And then they set their DVR to play last night’s Breaking Bad and all of those hopes blown away by Walter White’s first honest break down.

The wheels came off the wagon tonight as Walt was forced to deal with losing the one thing he never thought he’d have to lose: Jesse.  Their fist fight last week had lasting physical and emotional consequences.  While popping painkillers and sleeping the day away is good for the body, it appears to be taking a toll on the man inside the man.  And Walt’s out of support network at this point – until Walter Jr. shows up at his condo and forces himself into his dad’s life.  This relationship is too seldom explored in any depth.  Usually, these two are simply common victims of Skyler’s domestic tyrrany.  But Walt fears that they will have something else in common: a view of their fathers that doesn’t match the reality, and more importantly, doesn’t measure up to the father’s pride.

An interesting shift occurred in Walt’s character throughout the course of season 2.  He went from breaking bad to save his family, to breaking bad to feel good about himself.  The brilliant chemist that had been overlooked for so long was finally getting some respect.  And even if the respect was coming from corners of the world that were alien to a suburban high school teacher, Walt was ready to soak it up.  We’ve seen cracks is Walt’s facade as he hints and teases his secret.  More than having a high opinion of himself, Walt wants his family to have the same the same opinion.  He’s not the victim of a gambling addiction, his life is not in danger – as Walt asserted a few weeks ago – he is the danger.  And that’s the way he likes.  Or, at least, that’s the way he would like it.

While Walt takes an extended time-out to get his mind in order, the rest of his organization has kicked it into overdrive.  Jesse, Fring and Mike fly to Mexico to teach the Heisenberg recipe and generally make peace with the cartel.  Things looked pretty grim for Jesse.  Right up to the point that Mike the Cleaner clues us all in to a greater plot: “Either all of us are leaving or none of us are.”  Again, Fring takes a Walter White tactic – poisoning his enemies – and actually has the tenacity to pull it off.  Gustavo raises his shooter of deadly tequila and simply toasts “Salud.”  What makes Fring so much more effective is his willingness to actually do whatever it takes to survive, even if it means poisoning himself.

Continuing the I’ll-show-you-who-the-real-badass-is theme, Skyler takes Beneke’s tax problems into her own hands and straight-up gives him the money to pay off the IRS.  Still tap-dancing around the issue, Skyler visits Ted and asks why he’s not just applying his new cash windfall to his tax penalties.  Naturally, Ted doesn’t see why this is any of Skyler’s business, and she lays it all out on the table: Skyler provided that cash because she cannot afford to be audited.  The web of White Family dirty-money is growing.  I like Skyler and it’s great to have her at the forefront of her own criminal storyline.

I’m interested to see if the increased profiles of the Whites and Gustavo Fring will trip some sensors over at the DEA.  I’ve been saying since the beginning of the season that the next thread of premise to unravel has to be Hank discovering Walt’s secret.  That’s where my money is.

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Futurama: post-movies-production-season review

12 Sep I love this sort of thing

Bear with me a second.

During its initial run on TV, Futurama produced 4 different seasons of episodes which aired over 5 seasons on Fox.  Which means there’s a weird staggered effect and some episodes that were made in the first year were aired in the second, and occasional episodes were shifted years later (“Route of All Evil” notably was made in the third production season, but didn’t air until the fifth).  When the series was canceled after its fourth/fifth season, the active fan community had a hard time dealing with this disparity, especially as the DVDs came out grouped by production season and ordered as they were produced.  It’s a minor thing, for sure, but it helps to be able to group episodes together when discussing trends or gaps/spikes in quality.  The episode numbers assigned by the studios (and appearing at the end of each credit sequence) held to the production-season way of thinking, so the consensus on the internet was to think of this original run as four seasons.  End of discussion?

Hardly.  Five years after the last episode (the great “The Devil’s Hands Are Idle Playthings”) aired, Futurama experienced it’s first rebirth in the form of “Bender’s Big Score” – a straight to DVD film that would later be chopped up into four episodes.  BBS would be followed by three more movies, “Beast With A Billion Backs,” “Bender’s Game” and “Into the Wild Green Yonder.”  All of these movies were produced in the same manner the crew would have produced a new season of the show.  Thus making this production season 5.  But technically, they aired during a “sixth” season, but “first” for Comedy Central, who had been running the rest of the series in reruns.

When Comedy Central picked up the show for another 26 episodes to be aired over the course of two years, they complicated the season-issue even further.  All 26 episodes constitute production-season 6, but as they were aired in 13-episodes chunks over the course of two discrete years following the airing of the movie-episodes, these could also be considered seasons 7 and 8.  iTunes has the new batch of 26 listed as seasons 7 and 8, but the DVDs call the first set of 13 “volume 5,” continuing from the previous seasons’ DVD sets, but ignoring the movies altogether.

The numbering of the episodes since the original run suggest the following: Movies are season 6 (even though there’s no production season 5); the first 13 of the new batch are season 7; the later 13 from the new batch are season 8.  Two more years worth of the show are in the pipe right now, again being done as part of a single production season – which is going to further exacerbate this issue.

Which is all to express why the title of this post is so convoluted.  I want to explore Futurama’s return to television in an HD, post-movies world.  It’s not all classic, it’s not even all good.  There are some real stinkers in the line-up, but also some gems.  Since Comedy Central makes it tricky to watch these episodes for free, it might be helpful for someone wanting to catch up to know what to avoid.  An awful lot has been written about each of these episodes, and for more detailed descriptions and opinions of them, I’ll refer anyone to the AV Club TV Club write-ups and, of course, Can’t Get Enough Futurama.

New Classics:

(These feel to me like proper extensions of the show’s original run, with copious amounts of heart and nerdy humor.)

The Duh-Vinci Code – Fry, Bender and the Professor go to Italy (and then outer-space, naturally) to uncover the secret of Leonardo Divinici’s machina magnifica.  More impressive than that machina is the non-stop joke machine that this episode becomes.  Light on emotional resonance, but packed with jokes and a ludicrously escalating conspiracy plot, this episode is just a fun ride.  “Hi Animatronio!“

Lethal Inspection – Bender and Hermies team up (what) to find Inspector 4, the man who let Bender pass inspection despite the fact that the robot had no back-up body.  This one starts with a pretty weak “Sithal War” reenactment.  That’s barely a pun.  Somehow, this episode mines some good fear and loneliness out of Bender.  That character needs to be humanized more often – at his worst, he’s down right evil; at his best, he’s cute and/or a good friend.  Here, he kind of transcends even his best and becomes vulnerable and impotent.

The Late Philip J. Fry – Fry, Bender and the Professor get into trouble testing a machine that only moves forward in time.  This one ends up serving as a high-water mark for the series post-original-run.  The high-sci-fi-concept serves the emotional core of the story well and the humor is relentless and spot-on.  While not my personal favorite of the newbies, I can see why this episode is held in such high esteem in the fan community.

A Clockwork Origin – The Professor defends evolution from those that believe in intelligent design only to later intelligently design his own form of life.  Some of the developments in this episode happen a little too quickly to feel organic, but the brisk pace keeps the jokes coming fast.  I’ll admit that I’m partially taken by this episode because of the way it mercilessly handles creationists.  The only real human emotion that eeks out comes from the Professor, in a line I’ve oft repeated.

The Prisoner of Benda – The Professor develops a machine that lets people switch bodies.  Hijinks ensue.  For me, this is the MVP from season 6 (or 7/8, or volume 5/6, or whatever).  Everyone trades bodies multiple times, and following the action becomes something of a mental exercise.  It feels a lot like “The Farnsworth Parabox” from season 4 – which is another one of my favorites.

Mobius Dick – Leela hunts down a space-whale that devoured the original Planet Express crew.  At some point, Leela stopped being the only sane person in the crazy house.  The first couple seasons had her pegged as an audience cypher, but her obsession in this episode borders on madness (as is fitting of a cartoon obviously emulating Moby Dick).  There’s a great scene that includes rubble of long-abandoned spacecraft, like Serenity and the Satellite of Love – there’s a fun game to be made of identifying them all.

Law & Oracle – Fry quits his job at Planet Express to become a cop.  In the process, it satirizes Police Academy (take that, Police Academy) and Minority Report (not exactly timely, but, sure, take that).  I credit by buddy Al with instilling in me the desire to see Fry succeed.  I know he’s the protagonist – and an everyman to boot – but Fry is frequently enough the butt of jokes that I genuinely feel good when he does well.  For my money, he’s one of the best heroes on TV.  We get this success in spades, plus solid jokes and a twisty plot.  It’s stupid fun, but I really dig this one.

Tip of the Zoidberg -  The Professor asks Zoidberg to fulfill his promise and kill him (with sexy results).  This is another one of these episodes that explores specific character relationships that we may have brushed off previously.  It’s interesting and a little touching.  Honestly, it’s just nice to see a Zoidberg episode that doesn’t suck (as far as I’m concerned, season 2′s “Why Must I Be a Crustatian in Love?” was the last one to succeed at all).  In addition, there’s a good Rue Goldberg contraption at the end, and who can say no to that?

Cold Warriors – Fry infects New New York with his 20th century common cold.  Taking a page from original-run greats “Luck of the Fryrish” and “Jurassic Bark,” this episode splits its time between Fry’s family life in the 20th century and space-age adventures in the 31st.  Oh but don’t worry, it doesn’t tug the heart strings quite so mercilessly.  There is one atrocious Barack Obama joke in the flashbacks, but there are also several adorable drawings of young Fry.  Balances out.

Overclockwise – Cubert violates the terms of Bender’s license agreement by increasing his processing power.  Mom puts Cubert and the Professor on trial, forcing Planet Express out of business.  Questioning their go-nowhere relationship and the struggling business, Leela leaves.  This one is jam-packed with incident – on writing that plot summary, it felt more like I was relating the plot of a full-length movie.  Unlike the Futurama movies, this episode gets in and out in 22 minutes and manages to hit a bunch of relevant emotional beats.

Reincarnation -  Futurama is reimagined in three different styles – old-timey black and white Disney (a la Steamboat Mickey), 8-bit video game and anime.  They all revolve around the destruction of a diamond comet.  Most charming of the bunch is the first – I’m a sucker for that kind of “golly-gee” earnestness.  But the others are strong too.  Even the anime segment finds some new and non-obvious shots to take at the genre (no small feat).

Good for a chuckle:

(I like these episodes, but I know that part of that is just me liking the characters and their universe.  They’re not without merit, but they’re also not anything special.)

Rebirth – The crew is killed and the professor brings the back to life.  Because,  you know, how else would the series go on?  This episode is cute, but since it’s the first one back after the movies, you can tell they haven’t quite found their sea legs yet.  The next two episodes (“In-A-Gadda-Da-Leela” and “Attack of the Killer App”) are on my don’t-bother list, so maybe this one is notable for simply not being terrible.  No, no, no, that’s too harsh.  There are some good gags here too.

Proposition Infinity – After dating Amy, Bender crusades for robosexual rights.  Get it?  It’s like Prop 8.  Hey, look, turn that 8 on its side, and it looks like infinity.  Topical humor is always sorta awkward on Futurama, and Bender’s super-jerk personality makes this a hard episode to love.  Luckily, the jokes salvage it some.  Again, not great, but also not terrible.

That Darn Katz! – Amy presents her doctoral thesis to the board at Mars University and the idea is stolen by a race of outer-space kitties.  It’s exactly as cute as it is stupid.  They go for a lot of easy cat jokes, but thanks to the internet, cats are funny.

The Mutants are Revolting – The mutants fight for their rights and we learn of the maiden voyage of the Land Titanic.  I guess one episode about the Titanic is just not enough for Futurama.  I’ve always like the mutants-in-the-sewers mythology, so further exploration is appreciated.

Futurama Holiday Spectacular – Another anthology-style episode that tells the stories of Robohanukah, X-mas and Kwanzaa.  The crew dies in each segment.  There’s also a song in each segment and an appearance by Al Gore.  I’m dazzled by the spectacle of this episode: “Coolio!”  “Al Gore!”  “Songs!”  “Kwanzaa!”  It is, however, occasionally embarrassing.  If I were feeling more hardcore, I might put this in the Ignore List.  But, the fact remains that I enjoyed the experience of watching this one.

Silence of the Clamps – For like the billionth time, Bender has a run-in with the robot mafia.  Clamps is featured prominently, which I like.  The problem with mafia jokes is I feel like I’ve heard them all.  Also, let’s be honest, that’s some grim shit to be joking about.  And of course, Bender is an unrepentant asshole.  Yay.

Benderama – Hijacking the Professor’s new matter duplication machine, Bender makes countless copies of himself.  Cool science fiction concepts are explored through the endlessly reproducing Bender.  Actually, some of the concepts they delve into are more straight-up science.  And I appreciate that.  Fine gags and Paton Oswalt – good enough for me.

The Ghost in the Machines – Bender dies, but his ghost lives on in the cloud.  After making a deal with the Robot Devil, Bender attempts to scare Fry to death.  I like that they explain how a robot ghost is possible, and the emotional beats surrounding Fry and Bender’s friendship at the end are nice, but it’s proceeded by 19 minutes of selfish, unlovable Bender.  Which, by definition, is hard to love.

Yo Leela Leela – Leela creates a children’s television show.  Kind of predictable, but every bit as cute and funny as it promises.

Fry Am the Eggman – Fry finds an egg that hatches into a monster.  Surprise, he loves the monster.  Too often, this episode relies on insane violence for laughs.  Also, the sorta-Scotish guys from the monster’s home planet are more miss than hit.

All the President’s Heads -  Fry, Bender, Leela and the Professor go back in time to foil a Revolutionary War plot.  I have a lot of fun watching this one.  There are a handful of nice history jokes and I’m always in favor of cartoonizing Ben Franklin.  The premise, however, is ultra-wacky.  I’m all for wacky, but the justification for time-travel here strains credibility.

Blights on the record:

(Oh goodness.  While each one probably has a few good gags, these episodes are unfunny messes.  When I started this list, I thought I would have more than 4 in this category – means they had about an 80% success rate… I guess that feels right.)

In-A-Gadda-De-Leela – A gigantic censorship robot threatens Earth.  Also Zap and Leela fuck.  It’s just too mean-spirited and not funny enough to justify it.

Attack of the Killer App – Everyone buys new MomCorp. EyePhones (sigh) and Bender and Fry compete for followers on their Twitter accounts.  Only it’s not called twitter.  This one is pretty awful.  And while I do like Mr. Chunks, a two-headed goat that cannot stop vomiting, the center-piece of the episode is Leela’s sing boil (named Susan) that sings Les Mis.  I mean, “groan-worthy” is too kind a description for that gag.

Lrrreconcileable Ndndifferences – Lrrr (ruler of the planet Omicron-Perseai Eight) has a fight with his wife Ndnd.  The Planet Express crew helps them get back together.  Not a recipe for disaster, but nothing really works in this episode.

Neutopia – The crew are made genderless and then forced to switch genders.  Lame jokes about men not asking for directions and women being bad at math ABOUND.  Remember the joy with which the men slung sexist jokes in “Amazon Women in the Mood?”  No such joy or ironic detachment joins the humor in this one.  Not hard to skip.

Bah!  I finished with episodes I don’t like.  Here – this will cheer us up and make us all feel better about Futurama:

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Okay, what do you want to watch?

7 Sep

Oh, that's probably not fair.

It’s become apparent to me that not many of my friends – and therefore very few of this blog’s readers – are watching Breaking Bad.  First of all: what the hell’s wrong with you?  Watch Breaking Bad.  Second: Let’s work on this, you and me.

We’re coming up on the 2011-2012 TV season.  Let’s pick out a show and watch it and talk about it and all that.  Something new.  I’m going to quickly go through the shows I’m sorta interested in, but I’m open to suggestions.

Terra Nova: Time Travel.  Survival.  Dinosaurs.  Honestly, the show itself could be terrible and I’d still watch it.  And yes, I realize that means I should be a fan of Land of the Lost.  Many of the shows I’m going to suggest have the potential to lay out elaborate mythologies, but there’s already a good bit of wacky built right into the premise.  Who’s to say how out of hand the governing principles of this universe might be?  Plus, it’s always fun to see the advancements made in CG for television series – and beyond that, the inevitable drop in quality of that CG after the pilot.  Also, dig that website, it looks like they’re kicking out some extra-show content right there.  I’m a sucker for the multi-platform approach.


Person of Interest: Ben Linus was was one of the first components of Lost that made me think I was watching, not just a fun show, but a great show.  Michael Emerson gets to play a crazy millionaire with access to some kind of predictive crime-prevention machine.  Only problem?  He needs a righteous agent of justice to stop these violent crimes.  Enter: Jesus Fucking Christ.  Jim Caviezel never really wows – he was such a charisma-blackhole in AMC’s Prisoner a few years back.  It’s on CBS, which is strange to me.  I’ve never actively followed a show on CBS, but, you know… firsts….


Once Upon A Time: I know, I know, I know – fairy tales are played out.  Ironic depictions, dark depictions, campy depictions, re-imagined, re-written, re-vamped.  Even the premise here – merging the fantasy world with the real word – is pretty much worn down to a nub.  Enchanted  only sorta works because Amy Adams is so fucking cute.  Why watch the thing then?  Eddie and Adam, of course.  Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz wrote on much of Lost‘s run and Once Upon A Time is their baby.  Like Terra Nova, this show has a nearly insane premise with the suggestion of a deep, interesting mythology.  Mix in writers like Eddie and Adam and an engaging world is basically guaranteed.

Hell on Wheels: And we round out the set of shows that I’m only interested in because of their connection to Lost with AMC’s new show about building railroads in  post-Civil War America.  The Lost connection here is Carlton Cuse.  At least, I think it is.  I know for sure I read that he was attached to this project, but articles indicating such are sorta slim pickin’s these days.  Well, Cuse or no, a sweeping historical drama on AMC is bound to be at least well-filmed and/or meticulously well-plotted and/or well acted.  And/or.


Awake: Hey, remember how Joss Whedon is pretty good at what he does, but there’s something about him that makes you want to punch him right in the fucking nose?  Well, his long-time collaborator, Tim Minear, put together a new show for NBC.  It looks to be either a psychological drama about dealing with loss (while solving murders) or a science fiction drama about traversing parallel universes (while solving murders).  Even if it just ends up being a procedural with a gimmick, it appears to be one hell of a gimmick.  I also really dig the way it’s being advertised, so I suggest watching the trailer.


Pan Am: Two things make me want to watch this show.  One is that I’ve been properly conditioned to love bright, colorful depictions of the 1960s – thank you very much Mad Men.  Second is that I think ABC really needs this show to work.  In LA, it’s virtually impossible to go outside without being bombarded with ads for this show.  With Desperate Housewives on it’s way out, they need another hit.

And then there are some runner-ups (runners-up?).  Stuff I wouldn’t mind watching:

Prime Suspect: The original changed the shape of criminal television procedurals.  This show has the same name.   

Revenge: Like the first couple episodes of every season of Gossip Girl, only with murder.  I’m not totally sold on it either.

Ringer: You guys like Buffy, right?  Well I still like Cruel Intentions.  Plus, mistaken identity revolving around twins?!  How Shakespearean!

Playboy Club: Another look at the 1960s through rose tinted glasses.  I expect they’ll lean too much on the T&A, and ultimately deliver on neither.

There’s a bunch more that I want to keep up with when they come back on – Mad Men, Walking Dead, Community, Parks & Recreation, The Office, 30 Rock, Fringe (if I can catch up in time), Boardwalk Empire and Bored to Death.  Shit.  If there are enough hours in the day.

So, what about it?  Anyone interested in any of these shows?  Anything I missed?  Anything I’ve got pegged totally wrong?

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Go West, Young Man – Part II

7 Sep

Actually trekking out to Los Angeles a few weeks ago marked a lot of firsts for me.  It was the first time I had ever driven through the Rocky Mountains.  It was the first time I’d ever been to Vegas.  It was the first time I’d been away from my girlfriend for longer than a week – at least, in the last couple years.  It was also the first time I actually took concrete, irreversible action toward trying to make it as a television writer.

Oh, I have been preparing my creative faculties for years.  I read books on writing fiction, writing for film and writing for television specifically.  I altered my viewing habits so I could follow a series with the sole intention of writing one.  As we all do, I wrote a handful of spec scripts – even wrote a pilot that I made a bunch of friends and family read.  I put myself through the ringer and took the subject of telling fun stories as seriously as I’ve ever taken anything.  So, why does the irreversible action gnaw away at my gut?

The firsts.  The unknowns.  The high-risk, high-reward variables.  It’s fear of success and fear of failure rolled into one amorphous putty.

But enough with the maudlin shit – what’s it been like so far?

The Drive: I left Chicago Chicago on Saturday August 20th around noon.  In the car with me was my then-constant companion: my little sister.  We were aided by a Magellan GPS which we had creatively nicknamed “Magellan.”  Never mind that we also had two iPhones and a US atlas in the car.  As everyone does when they have their first extended exposure to a talking navigation system, we anthropomorphized machine, thanking it for its kindnesses and laughing when it curtly suggests a U-turn.  We also mercilessly teased Magellan for dying of syphilis – a fate I guess we just assumed had befallen all great explorers.  Eventually, curiosity got the better of us and we turned to the Old Farmer’s Wikipedia for more information.  Turns out that after successfully circumnavigating the globe, Magellan and crew set to the thankless task of converting island heathens to Christianity.  One convert in particular made a deal with Fredinand: “Hey, since I’m worshiping your God now, maybe you can sail over to that island over there and kill this dude that I don’t like.”  Happy to oblige, Magellan went in with a small cadre of guys and absolutely got his ass handed to him.  Primary sources that recount his final moments list all kind of grizzly wounds before the guy actually went down, including numerous SPEARS TO THE FACE.  The account went on to describe Magellan as follows: “Our mirror, our light, our comfort, our constant guide.”  My sister and I then adjusted our respect-level accordingly.

Because neither of us are 19 anymore, we only drove during the day and broke the 30+ hour journey up into 4 days: Chicago – Lincoln; Lincoln – Grand Junction; Grand Junction – Las Vegas; Vegas – LA.  Anyone that’s made this trip before can tell you how geographically uninteresting the first day is.  What’s that?  More gently rolling plains?  Cool.  It’s not until you enter Colorado that the landscape starts to change.  The hills become a little more severe.  But the door get blown off the thing at Denver and you’re engaging with stone cold mountains.  And then it doesn’t let up – ever.  From Denver on, my sister and I were awestruck.  Occasionally, there’d be something specific to point out – like that rock formation that totally looked like Diddy Kong – and other times we’d just mumble and wave our hands all directions.  If you’ve never done it before and have half a reason to, I recommend taking a drive through the Rocky Mountains.

Apartment Hunting: We wasted no time.  I mean this literally – we skipped lunch and everything.  We got into Pasadena at around noon and checked out three apartments.  They were… they were fine.  Look, I don’t know why, but carpeting seems to be the norm out here.  In my mind, a rental should never be carpeted.  That’s just begging for trouble.  Smelly trouble.  Unsatisfied, we checked out one more listing, this one sandwiched in the Franklin Village/Hollywood/Los Feliz area, right in the shadow of Griffith Park.  At first glance, the place is awesome – cool mid-century Hollywood feel, fake hard-wood floors in the unit itself, weird crown molding and columns on the walls.  When held up to a little scrutiny, it’s obvious these niceties were achieved on a budget: door jams are crooked, the paint job is sloppy and anything that slides open does so under duress.  But it’s nice and the location is great and the whole package is in our price-range.  So I get the ball rolling and head to my cousin’s house for the next couple nights.

My cousin, Michelle, lives in Santa Clarita with her husband and two sons – 4 and 6 years old (the sons, not the husband).  I had a great time reconnecting with this section of family, but had a hard time shaking the feeling of being a tourist, an imposition, in someone else’ life.  So we watched the kids when we could and also got out whenever we found something do to.  We saw Jon Brion at the Largo that Friday night.  A Jon Brion show is an unexplainable experience, and every time I try, I feel like I’m telling lies.  The man literally takes requests from the entire catalog of everything.  Seemingly nothing is off limits.  And then he does whatever in his power to create a satisfying musical experience from those requests.  And he is powered by something fierce, boy I tell you what.  While shuffling across the stage with his eyes rolling back in his head, Brion churned out a sweeping, 30-minute rock-rendition of “I Will Survive,” which was initially requested as a joke.  It doesn’t make sense.  It shouldn’t even be possible.  But it is incredible, in every possible sense of that word.

After a couple days, the apartment in Hollywood was secured and I moved in with no stuff.  My sister was still with me at the time and we slept in sleeping bags on the aforementioned pseudo-hardwood floors.  Between that and the near-constant siren noise that reaches an apartment building just of Hollywood Blvd., I’ve had better nights sleep.

The Pieces Fall Into Place: My sister left on Tuesday/ Girlfriend arrived on Wednesday / Stuff arrived on Thursday.  So naturally, we went to IKEA on Friday.  IKEA is a strange experience for me every time.  I always go in thinking that I’m going to throw down some real money and walk out of there with bold new furniture that will be fun and functional and change my life in some minor, but measurable way.  Four hours later, I leave with three pieces of furniture I don’t outwardly loathe, and I’ve only dropped 80 bucks.  I become such a cheap skate at IKEA, and any flights of fancy I may have had about buying into an identity go right out the window when I see that the ugly one is half the price.  I’ll go ugly one every time.

Since then, it’s been a very take-it-as-it-comes attitude around here.  A lot of stuff is just different enough to really throw us both off our game, and the anxiety alluded to at the beginning of this post still resurfaces pretty regularly.  Firsts are hard, but as soon as you’ve experienced them, they lose their power.  At the very least, they lose that “first” status.  Let’s see how many more of these I can knock out.

Breaking Bad 406 & 407 – Problem Dog and Hermanos

5 Sep

Goodness, it’s been a little while since I got around to writing about Breaking Bad.  As my good friend Pete points out, no one comments on the BB write-ups, so perhaps it doesn’t matter.  Still, I have known from the outset that I write about Breaking Bad for me, not for anyone else.  It helps me unpack what I’m seeing.  As a writer, I am fascinated with what the show accomplishes, and while some of the grander strokes of masterful writing on the series are clear and obviously brilliant, the nitty-gritty of what makes the show incredible so much more elusive.  And that’s what I use this space for.  Read on with the knowledge that, at least as far as these BB write-ups are concerned, you’re in my space.

I was between cable boxes for Problem Dog, so I had to hit a double-dose of BB yesterday.  I’m glad I did, as both episodes serve as acting showcases for some of the show’s non-Bryan Cranston cast.  In a hauntingly honest scene, Aaron Paul unloads on his former NA group.  It’s been a long road for Jesse; at the beginning of season 3, he was coming to terms with the fact that he was a bad guy.  The same NA group helped him recover from his heroine abuse following Jane’s death, and they helped him again when he needed a new market for the extra Blue he was skimming off the top.  Here is a group that supported him in these vastly different endeavors, and when they can’t help him get over killing poor Gale, he gives them hell.  PTSD must be a hell of a thing to go through, and I can only assume that the constant reassurances of “you’re going to be okay” only exacerbate the issue.  Jesse leans hard on “acceptance.”  Objectively, he’s right – neither the people in his life nor the audience should be able to forgive his actions, so why do we keep letting him in, over and over again?  The week previous, Skyler suggested that Walt was a school teacher in over his head and “unable to quit.”  Whatever wound up not being true about that statement is the result of Walt’s desire for control.  But Jesse?  He started the series knee deep in the drug world, and while his hand has frequently been forced (often by Walter), he keeps going darker and darker.  And in his descent, he pushes away everyone that was close to him – Andrea, Brock, even Mr. White.  Walt seems to think that Jesse doesn’t see that Mike and Fring doesn’t really value him, but I think Jesse knows exactly what he’s doing.  He’s rising in the ranks of an organization that doesn’t give a shit about him, and that’s just easier for him.

Hank is another character finally embracing what’s easier for him.  I’ve always thought that Dean Norris’ Hank Schrader is a too frequently unsung standout in the series.  Since he put Tuco down early in season two, Hank’s been put through the ringer, emotionally speaking.  And while this turmoil has been anchored by Norris’ portrayal, I don’t think any of it hold a candle to the giddy, hopeful Hank we see in these two episodes.  Hank is on the job and he’s able to pursue a criminal without having to himself in a situation where he might be forced to take a life.   It’s good old fashioned detective work.  A good portion of these episodes was simply Hank explaining his actions, peppered with the usual Schrader bravado.  He still plays the ultra-tough guy, but comments about the sweet young intern quickly go by the wayside when he realizes he’s on to something bigger.  It’s a good time to be Hank.

Not as good a time to be Gus.  Fittingly, a lot has been made of Giancarlo Esposito’s ability to be a steely badass.  One need look no further than the third act of the season opener to be reminded of how effortlessly that man demand’s the camera’s respect.  Hermanos gives us a closer look at the character and exposes us to some soft spots beneath the surface.  I wonder how much truth there is to Fring’s story about the chemistry scholarship that was awarded to Gale – I assume quite a bit.  Especially given his history with his hermano in the pollo industry.  Somewhere, under all that steel, Gus is a kind soul that wants smart people to achieve their potential.  He values loyalty, professionalism and education.  But he also knows the world he bought himself into.  This is one of the crucial differences between he and Walt.  Walter always imagines that there is a perfect combination of words that will get him out of trouble; Fring knows those words and deploys them with grace.

Oh, and Fring’s gay, right?

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